Fainting season.

It’s not a real season, but it’s real to me.

We’re officially in, holy humidity and hot, I may faint at any moment season.

And my apartment is, um, a little warm. I’d give you a temp update, but my thermometer that The Nana and The GrandPa bought me years ago, exploded. Yes, it ‘sploded…. Must have been a hot day last summer that I didn’t check it.

To remind you of my hot issues, I give you these posts… Health Issues.* and Annoyed Angel + Heat = disaster.

My life is totally awesome, really. You’re jealous right now, aren’t you???

Thankfully, after working a bunch lately, especially in the HOT AS HECK kitchen, and spending today in the HOT basement putting away our food/dry good/frozen stuff order, I have been okay.

But I know the first episode of hearing/sight going is coming soon… I don’t know HOW I know, besides that it’s hot, but it’s going to happen. Really soon. I can just feel it…

I feel like I should buy a small cooler to carry around at all times, loaded with ice so I can put it on my wrists/neck…

Here’s hoping I don’t fall over one night at work… and if I do? Co-workers? Just throw a ton of ice on me. That’s all…. NO EMS. No Ambulance. I’ll be fine. Really.

* side note… the other health issue? Heartburn/lemonade? NOT AN ISSUE anymore it seems. As long as I don’t chug a gallon of lemonade, just gotta  knock it down a notch with ice and/or the frozen ice lemonade at the Dirty Bird store…  And I’m pretty sure that the heartburn has been gone for nearly 2 years because I don’t have the day job I had back then. Helps that you love your job. True story.

It also helps to have phone calls from your favorite baby lady… AKA Little C…  Just saying.

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Health Issues.

I truly do not have many health issues. Just two. One that is recurring all year long and one that sneaks up on me in the summer, especially this summer.

First of all, I have heartburn. And a very cranky stomach. Sometimes there’s no way to tell it’s coming. I go to bed, and 5 minutes later my chest is on fire. Often leading to me getting sick. Yes, physically sick. Other times, I know what to avoid- basically half of the foods I like.

I was on medication for heartburn for a quite a while. But I refused to do that for the rest of my life. So I watch what I eat. Or at least I try to.

But right now I’m down & out because I couldn’t stay away from lemonade. I had the perfect plan. Huge glass, FILLED with ice, then filled 2/3 of the way with spring water. And then topped with lemonade. And my stupid stomach said, “No way, Jose. We’re battling you on this one!” And I’m losing the battle.

The second issue doesn’t have a diagnosis. It’s just that if I somehow get too hot, I’ll faint. Sometimes it happens in the sun, other times it happens (no idea how) even if I’m in air conditioning. Unless I cool myself down (ice on the back of the neck &/or inside of the wrists), I will start losing my hearing, then my sight, and if I haven’t done anything about it by then? I fall over. Down. And. Out.

I’ve gone to the doctor for this many times. Some summers are worse than others. I don’t know why this one is especially bad – I’ve been hydrating more this summer than I ever have in my entire life. Every doctor I’ve seen has told me that I seem to have a blood pressure that is on the low end of normal. So that when I get too hot, it drops below normal and thus the issues.

Personally, I don’t believe this and feel there MUST be a real medical explanation. But we haven’t found it yet.

So instead, I have to leave the post office while waiting in line, I nearly faint at my friend’s house, in A/C. Or I run for shade after rugby games & practices in the late spring, all summer and early fall for fear I’ll drop over on my teammates…

I’m so sick of both of these issues. Especially this summer. Barf.